Saturday, May 9, 2009

WHAT BEING A MOTHER MEANS TO ME ~ PART TWO

Years ago I came across a lengthy poem where a young mother looking into the future of herself asked an older version, “Is the way long?” Certainly when I envisioned becoming a mom, my mind conjured up images of infants in my arms, chasing chuckling toddlers around grassy yards, tears dripping off my chin as I bade them goodbye on their first days of school, followed by bits and pieces of the future beyond that but, “Is the way long?” Even with my enlightening imagination I couldn’t possibly dream far enough into the future to see the end of the mother road.
When our children were little I thought I'd be done raising them when they were grown. Since then I have learned that while I have finished raising them I will never be done with being "Momma". Yes, my children grew up and they are quite independent but I dare say they still like knowing that Mom is still nearby not necessarily in a literal sense.
With all the years of practice that have gone before I am as ready as ever with prayers and words of loving comfort that I can provide but I still can't kiss away the pains of my children now anymore than I could kiss away that broken collar bone so many years ago. The hurts are even deeper now and while the desire to help has grown right along with it so too has the understanding that some things have to be handled by the adults they have grown to be.
But I’m a mom and aren’t moms supposed to fix things? I struggle with the weight of a multitude of concerns of so many I love. Jesus' weeping over Jerusalem tells me He fully understands my desire to fix everything! (Matthew 23:37) "…How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings…” Yet in Christ’s example I see again the need to let God work His will in His time. Though I don’t know the future He does, and His will is perfect.
The years I have lived say the way has been long but the memories in my mind clearly recall the feelings of the first-time placement of the newborn infants in my arms, the snuggling breaths of the sleepy toddlers against my chest and neck as they trusted me to hold them away from the rest of the world, and the letting go of the dimpled hands as I entrusted them to a bigger world than I could provide when they wandered into their classrooms on their first days of school…
“Is the way long?” The answer must lie further down the mother road.
© Marilyn Sue (Libby) Moore 5-9-09